Dumb me, my Smart phone's gone!

My phone’s screen is broken.  It's not with me, it's at the repair shop being poked and prodded and repaired. Right now, I don’t have a smart phone with me, not even a spare smart phone. I feel very lonely and dumb.  

I can’t check my mails on my phone. I can’t search google for random crappy things that I prefer to do so I can avoid using my office laptop, and get some relief from work wihtou it being in the history of my machine that can be tracked by the organization's IT department if it so desires. I cannot order food! I cannot order a cab!

I can’t check WhatsApp and send random messages! Quirky observations need to be held in check. Distress calls must be postponed. I cannot ask my husband when he is going home from work so I can plan to stay longer in office, or go visit that quirky shop I have been meaning to visit on my way back home from work. I can’t shop in peace and discretion on Amazon or Flipkart or Club Factory or Jabbong or Myntra. I need to exercise caution that my manager is not around. I can’t play solitaire or reply to my mails when I am having lunch or going for a stroll or waiting for my computer to reboot.

My life is going in slow motion. It feels like that kind of a video where the central character is standing still and around that character, the crowd moves, day becomes night and yet that character stays still and unmoving ... dumbstruck. I feel like that character. Dumbstruck. Amputated.

I don’t have a land-line. Just my beloved mobile phone that I use for banking, shopping, searching, entertainment, information, games, pretending to be busy, avoiding conversations, engagement. Now, I must watch television, open my laptop, open chrome and search and shop online. I must have a conversation, or fidget with my hair, nails, fingers. Look away or look awkaward, hum a tune, seem interested in my surroundings. I must cook food if I am hungry or use my husband’s phone to order online. I can’t give in and satisfy my secret food cravings and let them remain (relatively) secret. I need to use my bike or go by bus or metro and not use my phone to book a cab. Heavens above! I need to go back 15 years into the past!

Now, even if I log in to my Gmail from an internet café, I will be paralyzed, because the OTP will be sent to my smart phone to verify my identity. Suddenly my password is not so important. It’s my mobile phone that is my identity! If I want to search for apartments or have an online interaction, my email is not important. My website log in details and password is not enough to verify that I am me and not anyone else. My smart phone will automatically get the information – one message – and voila! my identity is verified!

But I am not very disheartened. I still know the whereabouts of my phone. It is in the process of becoming whole. It is simply being repaired. I will be rejoined with my modern identity case and my life long partner in a few days. I thank God that my phone is not LOST! Imagine – what if it gets lost and falls into the wrong hands…?!!!?

Imagine, my phone gets hacked, that person figures out my passwords; mobile banking passwords and email passwords and gmail passwords; has a peek at my WhatsApp messages. He can duplicate my entire life and day to day activities. That person can ogle at my photgraphs - even those ones that I took to check if the seat of my pants does not have any stains or to check if there is pimple at the back of my neck. 

My online identity can be duplicated and soon my money and messages will not be in my control. That rectangular silicon block encloses my entire life and day to day activities. I had spent so much time and effort choosing my phone, my inanimate life partner who knows all my needs and caters to all my demands at the speed of light! It would now be in the uncouth hands of a stranger who is practically raping me without my knowledge!

Today’s apps, activities and conveniences are all designed with the smart phone in mind. The laptop era has long gone. From the computer and internet era, we have entered the smart phone era. Internet security is now passé. Phone security and mobile internet privacy is the NextGen worry. Even as the size of the gadget reduces, the scale of worry and possessiveness has only increased. 

I had lost my phone for a few hours. Some good soul found my phone and returned it. but during those couple of hours, my prayer to God was, “Please God, it’s alright if my phone is destroyed, but let it not fall into the wrong hands!”