Gravity

Floating by…

A stringless kite

Hoping against hope

Searching for gravity

Looking down from my high perch,

Wishing I was on terra firma

Bobbing up there,

Smiling…

Smiling uselessly,

Wishing for gravity,

Looking at upturned faces that see me

High up in the sky

Wishing to be in my place,

While I wonder
where my place

Really is,

As I float on by

in the wind's pace,

looking for a place

where I can find gravity

that will hold me steady,

Let me feel the ground,

Feel the grass between my toes,

The mud getting stuck in my toe nails,

Cooling me,

Making me feel

Firm and steady.

As I bob up and down

Up in the sky,

Smiling…

Hoping against hope

Gravity

Floating by…

A stringless kite

Hoping against hope

Searching for gravity

Looking down from my high perch,

Wishing I was on terra firma

Bobbing up there,

Smiling…

Smiling uselessly,

Wishing for gravity,

Looking at upturned faces that see me

High up in the sky

Wishing to be in my place,

While I wonder where my place

Really is,

As I float on by

in the wind's pace,

looking for a place

where I can find gravity

that will hold me steady,

Let me feel the ground,

Feel the grass between my toes,

The mud getting stuck in my toe nails,

Cooling me,

Making me feel

Firm and steady.

As I bob up and down

Up in the sky,

Smiling…

Hoping against hope

The Saree

I love this garment. It is actually a large piece of cloth. Normally 6 yards long. It can be worn in any manner you want. Sexy or homey. Professional or party wear. Traditional or stylish. Just this one piece of cloth. It can be worn in many ways.

Women can have their region, language and culture identified. They don’t need to speak. Just drape the saree and voila! Your origins will show. You may speak any language, but the way a woman drapes her saree will give her away.

Amazing! How this ancient dress (for lack of better word) still is used in today’s modern world of cocktail dresses, jeans and skirts. It’s still professional wear for many in India. It’s still an elegant piece of artistry that is draped on your body. Somehow when a woman drapes a saree, she becomes more elegant. Even when she walks gawkily, there is a certain grown up air about it.

I remember my childhood when I used to try and drape the saree my mother discarded after she returned from college. It would be warm and cool at the same time. I used to stand in front of the mirror and try to wind the huge piece of cloth around my waist. It was ridiculous. I would wonder how she can wear it so quickly and neatly. Where do you start? One must indeed be an adult to be able to drape this huge thing around you and let it make sense. It covers a woman’s body – any woman’s body – fat or thin – in a way that looks so natural and beautiful.

Many in my generation feel that it’s a pain to drape a saree. They proudly say one of the things they don’t know is how to drape a saree. Its not requisite for an adult Indian woman to know how to drape a saree. Why should we? When we get those pin up ones and readymade types? O but the freedom of draping it the way you want! The pallu can be free or pleated; long or short. The pleats can be 6 or 8. It can be hugging your lower body or just loosely draping it…

They feel its old fashioned. But have you looked at the cloth of a saree? The Kanjeevarams, the Banarasis, the Mysore Silks, the georgette ones, the satiny ones, the elegant cotton ones… those designer sarees with embellishments. They are so beautiful! I know it makes you look like a walking jewellery shop or an art-book at times… but it has some style! And you can legitimately show your mid riff to the world and no one will say, ‘Chee! How indecent!’

I had one saree that I took to London when I was a student. I would wear it every time I missed home. Whenever I wanted to feel elegant and Indian, I would drape a saree and read a book in my room. I would look out the window and see all those women with a skirt and blouse or jeans – all bundled up and hurrying in the cold. They seemed to look so colourless. In contrast, I felt as if I was so full of colour and vibrant. Even if my saree was black, it felt so vibrant! It made me feel so... cool!!!

What with Rekha and Vidya Balan making it a style icon, it seems to have regenerated. But I feel it never was out of style. Look at the Indian Mamis – anywhere they go, they drape a sari and walk out. It can be New York, Durban or Mumbai.

The garment remains. An eternal symbol of womanhood. Flexible, graceful, eternal and multi-tasking.

India and Alienating Pakistan

Pakistan and India are the separated siblings. They are quite similar in culture, food, behaviour and language, to an extent. Other than the fact that they are a muslim nation and India is a (mostly) hindu nation. The people of both countries are equally kind and equally callous to each other. When abroad, they are mistaken to be one. There is no difference between an average Pakistani and an average Indian. Both can be quite overbearing and obnoxious and end up speaking the same language when drunk. They both also like the same kind of food (in general) and it’s tough to differentiate.

Back home, the average Indian can go to America, UK Africa but Pakistan is quite a difficult place to go. It’s the same for our neighbours. But when we do end up going to the other person’s country, we are treated well. The people are kind helpful and nice. Especially if they know you are an Indian in Pakistan or vice versa. Except of course that the police and army personnel covertly or overtly follow you around. It’s just for safety. Nothing personal.

But then no offense to Pakistanis, they have the army personnel for protection of every foreign national. It’s just that it is the hotbed of terror and home to terrorists in South Asia. As Indians, we definitely feel safer. We also somewhat sympathise with the average Pakistani who has to live in such uncertain climes. Though, I am sure they are not all that fettered and go about their business just as usual.

Then come the Uri attacks in September and we get all hurt and angry and completely hate the country. We want the bloody Pakistanis to pay for what they did to our army. Those terrorists are so sneaky… that ISI and the Pakistani army always collude and use India like a training ground! We need to take a tough stand. We need to fight back. Our PM and our army assure us that India is not going to sit quiet and they will strike at a place of their choice and time. All the Indians are happy. A few days later when we hear about the surgical strike, we feel even better. Jingoism at its peak. Mera Bharat Mahan! Definitely! Our Prime Minister goes onto the international forum and declares Pakistan should be declared a militant state and that they should be alienated.

We agree. Pakistan is a hotbed of terror and breeds terrorism. They are the worst kind of state and we require that it should be alienated. Yes! Definitely so!

So we should not do business with them. We should not have Pakistani artists working in India and in Bollywood. Uh?? Where did that come from? Alienate them sure – I mean politically and all that is just fine. Economically? Uh… like not do business with them? There are families who have relatives in Pakistan and vice versa. They do visit each other and still interact. During partition, one half stayed there and the other came this side and vice versa. How can we alienate one half of our families? It seems so strange… even partition has not been able to do that and now, just to prove we are patriotic, we need to ignore one part of our families and friends?

Besides, artists are an international family. Why should we alienate artists from the other country? Politics has entered sports, but somehow, it has stayed away from art and films. Why should it start anew in this area of life? After all, music and art have bound these two countries traditionally. That is not the train of thought one likes to think of when thinking of alienation of our neighboring country which is a hotbed of terror. How can the handsome Fawad Khan or the melodious Atif Aslam have anything to do with terror? It's like alleging that blue-eyed handsome chaiwala is going to blow your head off while he serves tea. Ridiculous!! 

Alienation on a social and economic front is quite difficult for the Indians and Pakistanis because the fabric of our cultures and societies are quite interwoven in a subtle manner, irrespective of the political situations in our respective countries. We are empathic to each other and understand the others difficulties on a day to day basis since we share almost the same mentality and behaviour. We are not exactly foreign to the other but definitely forbidden. So we look at each other with curiosity, not fear or revulsion. Except during cricket matches and world cups. Only then the political and the social sentiments match and we definitely want those bloody Pakistanis to lose! It is only in the sports and political arena that the 'tu tu mein mein' of these bitter neighbours rears its ugly head. But after the match is done, the tempers cool and hopefully India wins the match, life returns to normal.

This same sentiment of economic alienation is quite easy to observe when it comes to Chinese goods. Though they are cheaper in price, they are cheap in quality as well. though there is variety, technology and all that razzmatazz, its easier to accept that we can avoid the Chinese goods and be Indian and buy Indian. The average Indian can just not relate to the average Chinese. We are linguistically and culturally far far away from ‘those Chinkies’ and alienating them is relatively easy.

The lunchbox

The lunchbox. Signifies food. With food is associated life and joy. All things positive. At the least, sustenance. This movie has so many symbolisms in it. It’s a beautiful movie that leaves you with a smile. Its poignance is amazing. Quite rare for the brash overly glamourous Bollywood cinema which is thriving more on on-your-face emotions.

There is subtlety and love and romance and betrayal and death and the past and even the future somewhat told altogether at the same time. Old reminiscences and how they rejuvenate our present lives, old betrayals and how they hurt us…yet its not time, but our own will power that makes us move on. Time does not heal things. It's us.

A simple mistake by the world famous dabbawallahs leads to a unique relationship between a crotchety old man and a lonely housewife who finds that her marriage is going to the pits as she has a cheating husband. The old man is a lonely widower who is a month away from retirement. The lonely housewife is on the verge of suicide. Both of them save each other like strangers often tend to do once you confide in them. He appreciates her food and she appreciates the care he showers on her. They have never met each other. She satisfies his need for good food. He satisfies her craving for attention and gives a few minutes of his time to her. They never meet. In the era of emails, WhatsApp and whatnot, they communicate through little pieces of paper which are wrapped in fragrant chappatis. Soon she awaits the return of her empty dabba and the reply he sends and he awaits for her delicious, spicy food and mundane recollections of her mind, her life and her thoughts. The empty dabba and pacifying words soothe her sad, comfortless life. She has an ailing father and a tired mother. A young daughter and a cheating husband. He has memories of his dead wife, noisy children of the neighbourhood and an empty house where he watches television and smokes.

These 2 very disparate characters blend their lives and come together through little pieces of paper that convey hope and despair; memories and advice; friendship and care. Mostly friendship and care. 2 people who end up getting to know each other. Through the lunchbox full of food, and little pieces of paper.

The way to the heart is indeed through the lunchbox.

Oscar WIlde's Picture of DOrian Gray - Review

After reading Oscar Wilde’s portrait of Dorian Gray, it is amazing how I want to simply empty my mind. I just want to be alone and be with the good things in my life. Nature, children, dogs…he has spoilt the value of a beautiful garden by polluting it with the association and importance gardens have in Dorian Gray’s cruel and wicked life.

It is after all, in a beautiful and sweet scented garden that Harry meets Dorian and begins his corrosive influence on that boy. It is amazing how evil is so fascinating to a boy with such angelic looks.

In the satire, where the Irish writer goads the English tendency to love the looks of things and how they seem, he has excelled himself by creating the sadistic character of Dorian who is angelic only to look at. The devil lurks underneath his beautiful looks that never fades away. It is his portrait that suffers from the sins that eventually catch up with him. A powerful book on how ones actions affect ones looks and life.

Reputation, society, looks, status – all are scorned by Oscaar Wilde’s infamous book – the picture of Dorian Gray. An Irish in the land of the English, how much ever he tried to emulate the mannerisms of the English, his Irishness was pre dominant. He never fit in because of that and ended up scorning the English society for the hypocrisy that it reeked of. Birth, status, money – in that order were more revered than the man for who he was. He proceeded to showcase the ultimate hypocrisy by creating a character in his book who had all – wealth, status and looks. He only lacked good morals. What he lacked, he scorned it on every one else. Morality and honour were heavy baggage to carry and soon in his youth, he is fantastically able to trade these for retaining his good looks and youth. The artist who creates and captures his fantastic youth and angelic good looks on canvas secretly worships him and has him for a muse till his cynical, world weary acquaintance captures the attention of the young man. He takes him under his tutelage and is amazed to find a willing student in Dorian Gray. The painter in the meanwhile despises his snatching away not only the attention but also the innocence of his muse. Dorian, in the meanwhile, wishes that he remain as chaste and youthful as his portrait. By some chance of fate, he manages to get his wish true and goes down the alley to seek hedonistic pleasures and have his senses over rule his morality.

He can see the depth of his corruption, as his soul seems to be captured in the portrait. He sees the degradation he has wrought on himself as often he sees his portrait. But, on his face, nothing shows. His looks are as angelic as his actions are filled with devilry. It is because of his good looks, his wealth and status that Dorian manages to still exist in society. No one openly cuts him except men who are morally far above him or women who have been dishonoured by him. These women, have no status and are ostracised. Young men try to emulate him and other men are simply jealous of his ‘achievements’. No one tries to cut him and tell him off, except the painter. He is afraid to believe the tales society whispers about his ex-muse. The old man, Basil, is shocked at the atrocities his ex-muse has allegedly committed and goes on to confront him about this. When he does, the evil in the young man overpowers him and he blames the old man for all his misdeeds and kills him. His portrait duly has a spot of blood in his hand but his hands are really blemish-less to look at. This in turn frustrates and enamours the young looking man as, by now, Dorian is almost 40. Though he looks just as he did when he was 19. He starts looking at his youth as a curse and tries his best now to remove the stains he has created on his soul. But does not realise that it is a long and tedious process. After doing a single good deed, which actually is simply a whim, he checks on his portrait. when he sees, the hideous portrait remains unchanged. in his anger, he wants to destroy the mirror of his soul. That kills him instead.

In death, his body shows the degeneration that has been wrought on it because of the evil mind that possesses it. The picture becomes as beautiful as it originally was. Death reaches out and takes his ignoble soul away. But no one recognises the degenerate body that it has left behind and he is left unrecognized in death – the worst that could have happened to him in life.

Positivity

It is something we take for granted. It’s the most intangible asset an employee can have. It is the most ignored aspect in the world. It’s not just in the professional world, but in life as well.

Its absence is felt much greater than its presence is appreciated. In fact, absence of positivity is dangerous. It can erode teams, individual and the morale of people who work in the team. Lack of a positive outlook in our professional life helps to make us tie over difficult patches. It also helps us look at a problem in a better way looking to solve the problem and not to blame someone else for a problem. People become instruments to solve problems, not the reason for problems. The way we look for solutions change.

This does not mean that only positivity should be there. That would be naiveté. It would be calamitous. A healthy dose of realism and caution is required. Friction, after all, is quite important; else we would all be slipping and breaking our skulls.

Negativity at the work place makes you think less. It’s like a weighty burden on your shoulders. You drag your feet to work. You start talking about ‘other things’ when sitting with your colleagues for a coffee break. A break from work means you talk shopping, friends and which places have vacancies. Thinking about your work and improving in it is a thought that is galaxies away.

Such an employee is simply being there in the ‘now’ as he does not see himself in the future of that company. It even spreads. It’s a virus. Especially when someone in a lead position carries a negative attitude about him/her, then it’s detrimental to the entire team. The team is now different units. They do not function as a team. They are individuals who make up a team and do their different duties. They come to office and think of leaving. Finishing assigned tasks and leaving for the day so they can pursue their other life.

Companies should see to it that they address issues of leaders with negative attitudes.  Companies must introspect if these negativities are founded on fact or if the individual is negative by nature and always looks at a glass half empty. It may be possible, in that case, that there is a reason for all the negativity floating around. If it is because such influencers in the team are by nature negative, then the team may scatter and  the doers of the team will soon find alternate paths or may not perform to their best capabilities. The loss, ultimately, will be felt overall and may create a ripple effect.