Respect!

The brutal rape and assault on Delhi girl Damini was deplorable. It was an invasion of decency, privacy and civilized behaviour by the men who did it. everyone has focused on what the poor girl had to go through and how the men, ooops! wait, the boys treated her. They beat her to death after raping her. Calling them animals would insult the animals. They are barbarians.
She died after a brave attempt at life, but had sustained too many serious imjuries to vital organs to really stay alive. So mercifully death wrapped her arms around her and took her to a safe place.
Enter the politicians and the news media of the day. Politicians' varying comments on it ranging from making an anti rape law named after her and then others saying that she has crossed the 'Lakshman rekha' and so invited doom. Then again others saying that women who are indecent should expect such treatment to be meted out to them.
No one has given kudos to the only man in the whole scene - the guy who was with her at that time and tried to protect her. Who, even after the event, tried his best to protect her and get her treated ignoring his own injuries and condition.
This is a clear case where there is apathy not only for action, but also for respect to individuals. These 2 people were thrown naked on the road after suffering so many injuries and indignities. Our country instead decides which is the best and most flowery way to comemorate the girl's death and give it as much air time as possible.
The underlying issues of safety in cities and respect to women and people in general is conveniently ignored in this whole tamasha. For, it has become an air time tamasha...so much of bruhaha and as usual nothing gets done!
O just switch off your television sets! Think about how you can change this situation. And do it. Candle lit marches are sooo not done! If there wasnt any media coverage of this march, would the people still hold these kind of things? I doubt.
Instead of condemning all men, think about that one guy who tried to protect her. Has anyone done anything or even said anything to him. Now, that's a man! Really kudos to him! I applaud his bravery and also his maturity in keeping his needs secondary to hers. I hope he maintains his dignity throughout and doesnt go beserk in the media frenzy that will cloud him now that she is dead and the media vultures will want to know the gory details. (Already today's newapaper has one of this as headlines).
There was an interesting insight by one of the socilogists in the panel in CNN IBN tha really got my goat. She went on to say that women in India have been suppressed and that they follow the patriarch of the family. While that may be true in some cases, not all cases are like that. Today's urban woman, and yes our victim was also one of those, is assertive enough to tell the man of the hoouse to shut up and mind his own business if need be, subtly or otherwise. Like I once heard a woman in a movie say, 'Men are the head of the family, but women are the neck on which the head rests. We can turn the head which ever way we want.' I guess most women in the world know that :-D
Just because some men are barbarians not all men are. But men do need to realise that if any woman has style and attitude and is bold enough to flaunt it, she is not asking to be molested or raped. She need not be subjugated and neither is it the man's duty to show who is sexually superior - by force. They not only have an overdose of testosterone but are also perverted in their thoughts and attitudes. These men should be chemically castrated. Or otherwise too!
Men in this country need to appreciate that women can wear what they want and let them be. There are so many men who show their chests off hairy adn disgusting. Could we please wax their chest hair publicly? Just because we dont like it? They too dress inappropriately and show off their underwears. Could we also undress them and have them walk naked on the roads? Saying it is easy but the fact is women are physically weaker.
People in this country need to develop a decent attitude. Its not the dress that women wear but the eyes which undress the women in this country. That is actually the main problem. Sometimes, like in this one, the hands and actions follow the eyes.
Besides, I feel it is wrong to say that in India, women are not given enough respect. Is it lack of respect that there are so many women politicians in this country? Jayalalithaa in the south, Mamata Banerjee in the east. Mayawati and Sushma Swaraj in the north. Top it all, the neck of the country, President of the Congress Party Madam Sonia is directing the head of the country (the poor man!). With so many women in leading positions, its actually quite pathetic that the common woman of this country has to face quite an uncommon amount of physical and mental torment.
Instead of quibbling about what name to give the law, can the people please make the law and more important - implement it, please?

The empty screen

You sit in front of the computer, staring at the screen...willing your mind to generate a few words so you can get rid of the inertia and let the words flow. The design of the page is wonderful, the room somehow looks messier, so you want to clean it up and make the space less distracting. Then you remember chores that could have done 2 days back, but haven't yet managed to do. Once you are done with that you sit once more and face your nemesis - the blank screen. But then the phone rings and you start jabbering into it and lose focus. The blank screen with the designs on the sides is left alone for the day. But tomorrow always is alive. There's another day, another chance.

So when the sun rises the next day and you finally decide to get off the bed and greet the day, you finally begin writing. The words flow, but they seem to be all wrong. They are so jumbled and inarticulate that you are ashamed to say you can write. Argh!!!!!!!!

Ctrl A + delete. Start afresh. 

Blocked.

Beat your head against the wall.

Go eat some chocolates.

Read a novel.

Drown yourself in it.

Order food at home.

Look at the blank screen,

contempt written all over your face,

look away from it like its some horrible crime scene and in a way it is - for you.

Then look at it once more, as though fascinated by it.

Mesmerized...

Stare at the screen like a zombie.

Your eyes droop with sleep.

Your head nods with exhaustion. 

But then you suddenly wake up. 

Dazed, you still look at the screen blank as your mind.

your eyes slowly close and finally you fight sleep no longer. 

As you wake up and see the keys, your tired mind forms the words slowly, hesitantly and soon you simply ignore the rest of the world. You are consumed by the screen, the words that are in your mind and your surroundings outside your mind mean little to you. 

Suddenly you feel something reaching out to you. you rest your tired fingers that have worked without a pause and touch the screen lovingly. This very screen that had tormented you so much... now its full of words and deeds that you wanted to show and see...and as your hands feel the screen, you feel that beneath the hard exterior there's someone out there, reaching out to you. Curious, you press the screen a little harder, with a little more pressure..there....there.... aaaah! right there....! Soon you too seem enveloped in the whiteness that had once flummoxed you. But you look a little deeper and hmm... what is that? A little colour, perhaps? Yes.. So you step inside and you see with your own eyes the world that you had created. That little world of yours that was once in your mind is right in front of your eyes. You know each one of them and they all look at you some what expectantly. A small smile creases your lips and the crinkles your eyes. 

Somewhere vaguely ... dimly...... somewhere faaaar faaaar away you hear a once familiar voice calling out... Nainaaa.....Nainaaaa...Naina where are you? 

'O My God!!!' Then silence....and when you look back, there's only darkness. But right there in front of you is a world of colour and excitement. you look ahead.

But outside, an empty chair swivels near the table....

Ghost of the past

The past is a very useful thing. It is who we were. But then things in the past make us change.
We change from who we were to who we are. the past us becomes a ghost. ghosts are an unpleasant existence. a pestilence of sorts. Unless they follow us in to the present, we end up letting them go. They are our ghosts - somethings that exist but definitely cannot be seen. Those should remain that way.
When they come and pry and poke you into your present then these should be ignored or simply cut off... because if one is not welcome, then one should not try to get in. It  is in bad taste and makes the other a cad.
In all things, there is a certain dignity that should be present. Once dignity is absent, then the relationship becomes disgusting. If both parties concerned understand this, it is more civilized. Else it speaks of some kind of mental perversion or a kind of derangement.
I hope my ghosts are all buried and all the skeletons in my closet are well and truly locked. I am older and wiser and certainly don't want anything other than a placid life peppered with a few exciting breath taking moments... after all, life is all about looking ahead towards the future and not looking over your shoulder to see if danger lurks around.
Ciao my past!
Hello future!
But the present is a gift!
:-)

Johnny Goes down!

Johnny goes down by Karan Bajaj is a very unlikely book by an Indian Author. Its a cool mix of Rambo and the author says Indiana Jones and that of a cute hindi movie and a Wild west movie. The protagonist – Nikhil Arya is an orphan in MIT who is all brains. Technical as well as computer. And all heart too.

He survives various extreme conditions without the CIA’s training and is as common as you and me. Yet, as uncommon as a lustrous pink diamond in a gutter in Mumbai. Common because he has a mostly civilian background and uncommon because he manages to not only survive but also succeed in all his extreme environments creating a successful track record for others as well as himself in the most unlikely ways. He is a passionate man who wants to denounce his passion very passionately at every stage but ends up being just as passionate about everything he does. And he does everything exceptionally well. Be it love making, money making or even computer game making. And of course he is tops at the game of survival. He touches lives and makes everybody love him. He is exceptional like that. Maybe movies and super hero comic books are full of heros like him. The lone riding gunslinger types. But this is the first I have read with an Indian protagonist. And I love it. Johnny goes down is a book of many shades and colours. It is one of the few Indian books that does not deal with bereavement and loss in quite the same way as others do. Its quite cheerful. Its actually up in the leagues of Jeffery archer types. I only hope and pray that he does not get type cast so that one book is like the rest. I cross my fingers for you Karan Bajaj... please churn out something exceptional and you have a faithful reader in me!

Love you!

A perfect day for writing - my mind is humming and buzzing with activity. My only problem is I dont know what to write on... So I simply write. The words flow by from my fingers. My miond tries to make sense of the cacophony of words that seem to flow through my system and into the new one - hehe play of words - the computer screen.
For the past 2 days i have been trying to do some decent work. But I have simply ignored the urge to write. But now that my arse has been plugged and the food I eat stays in, I have decided to give in to another of my natural urges - writing.
I listen to songs as I write. My feelings range from happy to sad to regret. Listening to Above & Beyond on the earphones, I soimply love the lyrics of the band group or whatever. They surprise me with their lyrics. Some how they make trance sound decent enough for me. I cant stand the repetetive sound of trance at times - like a stuck record that cant move beyond a point. Good Lord! move on will ya! Just one tune on loop like there exists no other tune...! The world of sounds are varied and beautiful. Explore my dear! But I guess this band has some how managed to make trance interesting. Guess its the lyrics.
Listening to sun and moon, i am reminded of my first love. I never thought I would forget him. I knew it would never work out. But I never thought I would ever stop loving him. I guess everyone thinks like that of their first love when they first fall in love. :-)
But then you grow up. Then you realise that there is more to love and life. Sun and Moon are just fine. But there are millions of stars out there too ;-)
Your thoughts do Linger but you dont live like a Zombie. You gotta let go. Because Love is not enough....even if you are truly madly deepy in love and even though I felt I knew you before I loved you, somehow, you managed to let me go. If only I could turn back time, I would stay forever in love with you. But if only I could...But then nothing is forever. And if it is, then it would never let you go. And neither would you let it go.
I am not sure if I am making any sense...but I am simply writing because
the words just flow,
the world around me is suddenly slow.
My fingers seem to whirl around on the keyboard.
my mind makes less sense than my fingers do.
But my heart sings along happily.
Content that words that are in my mind
are seeing the light of day.
sense or nonsense,
it doesnt matter.
'Cause sometimes, sense simply doesnt have a place
in your existence.
You need to listen to your heartstrings,
and simply bow down
to the inevitable
and let things move on.
For sometimes, things move on as you want them to,
but never the way you want them to.

:-)

Singing.... A passtime, a hobby, a profession... Some sing well some sing in the bathroom, some better not sing. My cousins - now they are great singers. they sing well.. but I really dont know what it is about plugging stuff to your ears that ruins your sense of tune rhyme and rhythm. One becomes horribly out of tune! Woe befalls all who do not plug their ears!
My cousin has a lovely voice. She can sing very well. But with a darned iPod plugged to her ears, I would rather be anywhere but near her! I guess the advent of the iPod started off with the walkman. The sony walkman which helped you listen to your songs without antagonising other people and their tastes. It has evolved to a lot of other indivisual music listening and storing systems. Awesome. But sometimes when people choose to sing along and do not realise they are doing so loudly...! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Interesting....

On the way to Bandra reclaimation, when you are going on the highway, there is this wonderful stretch of road which is wide and smooth and faces the backwaters of the Arabian sea. If you look below, you can see another road going into the suburb and then there is another road that takes a steep sort of curve which is reall beautiful. And beyond the railing at the end of the road, the dark waters swirl by in the moonlight or whatever.
There is a very unique way that this shoulder is used by my fellow city-zens.
Its a lover's meeting point.
The entire stretch of this railing has bikes parked at a uniform interval of a metre or so. I am sure if you measure the distance, it will be uniform. There are even cars parked along this railing. These also adhere to the distance between vehicles. These vehicles - all of them - have a couple either talking to each other, or coochi coo-ing. Not many coochie coo though - with due respect to these guys. Its the most decent lovers meet that I have seen. I guess there is another strange thing about this lovers rail - none of the couples seem to be really evesdropping on the others. I have never really seen any bored couples.They are always talking facing each other or looking at the sea or something, but never at the other vehicles parked around them. Likes its some unspoken protocol or something.
But this may also be that I am not able to see them at their ardous best because I always notice this stretch when I am whizzing past the highway. So I only notice that there are couples and that the entire stretch of this amazing sea line along the beautiful highway is lined with bikes and cars with lovers meeting up and catching up after a long day.
Its amazing how lovers in Mumbai end up finding the most wierdest yet most practical spaces to spend time together.
With no disturbance. Nobody really spying on them. Even if someone is going to be spying on them, they would know
because this highway is real broad and vehicles practically whizz past them.
Besides, the view is spectacular. Beyond the railing, you can see the dark waters of the sea swirling by and if the
moon is full, the reflection is beautiful. The breeze is wonderful and exhilarating. Its a rejuvenating place. If you are bored of your partner, all you need to do is look at the backwaters of the Arabian Sea or the traffic that whizzes past. :-)
Interesting city I live in ;-)